Update

I know that I really need to post something for you. It’s been a while. I just don’t really know what to say. There is so much going on lately, and I just feel….overwhelmed. I still feel kind of numb about my Gramps being gone. I think of him all the time, and I can hear his voice in my head. The first time I went back to the house, as I walked in the door a man spoke in the other room. I guess it was just my brain filling in blank unknowns with something familiar, but I swear when that man spoke, it was my Gramps’ voice. It felt just like any other visit, and that I should walk through the doorway and see him sitting at the dining room table smoking a cigarette and telling a story. But he wasn’t there. It was a friend of his. (who, incidentally, sounds nothing like him.) That was a very empty feeling. The funeral service was Wednesday of last week. It was very beautiful. Everything went smoothly. I was able to read my poem without breaking down, to the amazement of myself and many others. Gramps’ dear friend and “emotionally adopted” son, S, was asked to give the eulogy. He wrote a perfectly gorgeous tribute, but felt unable to read it, so the minister read it. It fit Gramps to a T. I never know S was so eloquent. Gramps was laid to rest in his western suit, looking handsome as always, with his coffee cup and the last pack of cigarettes he opened. The casket spray was wonderful. It was made with sunflowers and little daisy-like flowers and carnations. They included peacock feathers from Gramps’ own birds and his grey Stetson cowboy hat finished it off, tipped slightly to the side, just as he always wore it. (Gramps thought all hats should be tipped to the side.) We took J to the service, and he was a dream baby as usual. Despite the fact that he was up every few hours the night before crying and in pain with teething and a fever. I was so worried he’d cry when I stepped up to read my poem, but he never made a peep. I am so blessed to have such a good boy! The ride to the cemetery was long, and he began to get restless as we neared the end. I was turned around in my seat, giving him Tylenol and a bottle when we entered. I asked R what Gramps would think of me coming to his graveside butt-first. We both laughed, knowing Gramps would get a right good chuckle out of that!

The next few days just seem like a blur. Saturday it was beautiful out, but very windy. R and I took J to town that day and we got a new pair of shoes for R and for me. We went to a restaurant for lunch, then stopped in to visit some friends of ours we hadn’t seen in a long time. All in all it was a great day, and I really enjoyed spending time with just my husband and my son.

Sunday we went over to my dad’s house for a few hours. We had a nice visit. We watched my dad get out his tractor and till the garden. J thought that was utterly fascinating. Then he got to ride with his grandpa on the tractor from the garden to the shop. Very fun big-guy stuff! We had a nice lunch, and then J was beyond tired, so we headed home.

This week, J is at the sitter’s again. My mom is staying with B’s dad now. They finally got to take him home with hospice yesterday, but he is having a very tough time. They have expected him to go “any time” since Friday, but he just keeps rallying. I really don’t know what keeps the poor dear hanging on so. He is over 90 years old. I hope they can all find some peace and rest soon.

R has been battling with insurance company schmucks ever since his wreck. The other guy’s insurance didn’t want to foot the bill for a rental truck so R could keep earning a living while his is fixed. They didn’t want to pay him downtime either. Uh, hello! That’s the whole reason why people HAVE insurance!!! But once R hired a lawyer, all it took was a phone call and suddenly they decided they could rent a truck after all. Like I said, schmucks! It may come to a lawsuit to get the money for the entire week he was out of work before he got the rental, I don’t know. Fun times…..Fun times…..

So, now I think you are up to date on my life. Hope things begin to look up soon. Let me hear from you folks, as it brightens my day when I do! I’m always checking back here for comments. God Bless you and be careful out there! As R always says, there are two rules you must follow when you’re out: 1. Watch out for idiots. 2. They’re ALL idiots!